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John

36 • Spokane, WA • 5'10"

Dating apps don't have to be a tragic rom-com...

My name is John—a proud (and recovering) Nebraska kid, Spokane transplant, and long-suffering referee of my family’s nonstop chaos. They keep me humble… and slightly exhausted. My family and close friends are my ride-or-dies—equal parts best friends, personal comedians, and the reason I’m ridiculously competitive, fiercely compassionate, and emotionally bulletproof.

Looking For:

  • Active adventure partner thats able to laugh at the chaos ensues
  • Gets that "life partner" starts with "let's make each other's lives more fun."
  • Won't judge my "I miss Runza" rants or my toxic codependent relationship with Nebraska Cornhusker Football

Dealbreakers:

  • Emotional illiteracy (bonus points if you can pinpoint which childhood birthday party traumatized you)
  • Doesn't like dogs
  • Takes life too seriously

Proof I'm Not a Catfish (Mostly)

Life moments

John of All Trades, Master of None

Cheap diners and black coffee

Cheap Diners and Black Coffee✅

The Boyz

The Boys

Open to new things

Open Minded to Trying New Things

Can and will beard

Can and Will Beard

Hobby dog wrestler

Hobby Dog Wrestler

Optional Thirst Trap (Viewer Discretion Advised)

Curious?

Click to quench that mild thirst girl🫦

Easy now!

I like taking things slow...




Hobbies & Interests

Skiing
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I used to drive all the way to the Rockies to hit the slopes, so I'm thrilled to have closer options now. Some might even call my skills "expert level." I won't argue.

Want to ski together?
Reading
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I'm always on the hunt for new reads. Lately, I've been craving a book that'll gut me — I'm currently reading Flowers for Algernon, and the feels are already kicking in.

Book recommendations?
Dog Training
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My German Shepherd started it all. What began with basic obedience training has grown into full bite-suit wrestling sessions with working dogs.

Need dog tips?
Cooking
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I live in the Valley — and let's be honest, the restaurant options here are rough. I cook often because of that. Lately, I've been experimenting with a smoker, and it's been a game changer.

Recipe swap?
Music
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Live music rules. I'm an audio enthusiast with an eclectic record collection. As a guitar player of 20 years, I can definitely lay down a bar or two.

Concert buddy?
Cycling
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Road and mountain biking are newer for me, but getting out on the bike lately has felt incredibly liberating. My current favorite ride is in and around Riverside State Park.

Ride together?
Running
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I'm deeply involved in the Spokane running scene. I don't want to call myself a former ultramarathoner... because I'm planning a comeback!

Running partner?
House Projects
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I own my home and I'm a DIY enthusiast — naturally, I'm doing everything myself.

Need help?

Friends and Family Testimonials

Julie

Julie C. - Dental Health Professional

The guy with all the stellar dance moves, cringy or not he's got em all and he'll never let you dance alone! Loyal to a fault and will do anything for friends (even drop what he's doing in the middle of the work day to help change a flat tire). So if you're looking for endless laughs, fantastic conversation and an all around awesome guy? Look no further, you've found him!

Eddie

Eddie M. - Handyman to the Wealthy and Privileged

The kind of guy who shows up early, brings extra hot dogs, and philosophical insights. He can't be fazed by anything short of overcooked meats. Smart, thoughtful, and so dependable you'd trust him with your house, your pets, or your emotional baggage.

Kim

Kim D. - IT Specialist

100% loyal and the kind of friend that will always check in on you if you have been quiet on the communications and call you if he doesn't quite believe you when you say you are fine...just to make extra sure. He is goofy. He is a feeler. He is talented. He can fix a car, play the guitar or make a beautiful flower arrangement... he's got skills. He will make you laugh and shake your head at the same time. He is one-of-a-kind that you are lucky to have in your life. Oh and he gives good directions.

Annette

Annette K. - Registered Dietitian and Nutritional Consultant

Life can feel unpredictable and overwhelming in the best of times. It's nice to have dependability when you can find it, which is one of the many reasons you can't go wrong with John. You can always trust that this guy will be there when you need him. Green flags: dog lover, adventure seeker, surprisingly good on rollerblades, and growing a vegetable garden. Red flags: cares too much about Nebraska football, but again, no matter how bad they are, John is still going to be a die-hard fan. Through thick and thin and against all odds, he stays true to what he believes in.

Noah

Noah S. - Writer, Book Purveyor, Dirtbag Musician

I don't even know if John knows this, but he was the 1st friend I made in high school. 20 dang years ago! & through those 20 years, John has become more brother than friend. In college, late into the night, he took a running jump onto a stacked pile of 5 mattresses in my living room (don't ask why those were there). way overshooting it, he flew headfirst through the wall. I've no doubt we've all been there, but what sets John apart in this situation is guess who was over the next day to patch up the drywall? My dad...kidding...it was you know who...John. Now in those days we were a wily bunch of musicians, playing gigs in punk rock dive bars & musty old basements, having possibly a little too much fun (I could go on about the 3-day midwestern tour with a 13-piece band that ended in "the day of 3 midnights" at this family cabin in Okoboji, Iowa, yet that's a story for a different time). And while John is truly one of the most spirited, up-for-(almost) anything persons (John knows his limitations) in my life, at the same time, he has always been one of the most responsible & focused. John gets things done. always working on his cars or his house, training his dogs, or learning pedal steel guitar. I have always admired how he strikes that balance of being a let-loose-fun-loving dude & a grounded & responsible man. But the true pickle on top of this glorious cake is that you won't find a more true blue, loyal & caring friend. the real deal chap who will drop everything he's doing to help out someone he loves, whether it's lending an ear & a hug in hard times or helping to move a big tattered old couch through a too-small basement doorway. I've seen it more times than I can count. The only massive fault & possible deal breaker is John's deep-seated self-consciousness about his hips. I always thought they were perfectly fine, but that comment from the lady measuring us for homecoming suits really must have struck a chord when she said they were on the wide side. The guy will crumble in a moment if they get mentioned in any capacity. So if you can see past those wide hips, you will find yourself with the beautiful, caring, heartfelt, hilarious, joyful (I could go on & on) man that is John.

Beau

Beau W. - Butcher, Peddler of Cured Meats, Former Member of The Cave Kids

I've known a lot of the women John's dated over the years and none of them are dead.

Ratings Breakdown

Humor
Creativity
Romance
Intelligence
Communication
Empathy
Adventurous
Loyalty
Confidence